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what's that red stuff?
There are a lot of scary things going on right now. George’s two-front war continues to nibble and erupt. Gasoline relentlessly edges toward $4 a gallon. Some economists are predicting the housing market recession will last until 2010. Some clowns who couldn’t organize a trip to the buffet line are yapping about what they would do if elected president. And drought conditions persist like a wintertime cough.
No wonder people keep their heads down as they trudge from parking lot to office building, from house to barn, from time clock to loading dock.
The whole deal has become akin to eating spaghetti while wearing a good shirt. No matter how hard you try, you’re going to walk away from the table with red blotches on the front of your shirt.
It’s one of those things that happens to us and we don’t know why. We can sit down to a bowl of spaghetti while wearing a ragged Mott the Hoople T-shirt and make it through the meal with nary a speck.
A good shirt, however, has gravity of its own. It sucks in those little asteroids of red sauce and splats them on the fabric surface just as neat as you please.
We need to return the good shirt to the closet for awhile, don that old work shirt, and tell Them what we want rather than the other way around.
If George has a plan for his two-front war he needs to let us in on it. This stuff started in response to 9-11, one of the most atrocious crimes in the history of mankind. It started with U.S. soldiers hunting for Osama bin Laden. That was more than six years ago. We don't know any more about that goofball now than we knew when the hunt started.
Oil company greed and the price of gasoline makes a mockery of us all.
Let’s do the math.
A guy lives in Culpeper and works in Falls Church. He burns 40 gallons of gas a month making the commute, running errands, and doing the family thing.
A year ago he paid $85 per month for his gasoline.
Starting around February he can expect to pay $160 a month. Like most of us he buys his gas with a credit card. When the statement arrives he pays $100, which is all his budget will allow.
He’ll pay some $11 in interest on the remaining $60.
After four or five months he’s built a sizable debt. The gas that cost him $4 a gallon at the pump, will cost almost twice that much before he can erase it from his credit card.
He’s living in his dream house. He paid $300,000 for it in 2003. Rather than building equity in the place he’s sliding backwards. The housing market recession has trimmed the value of his house until he’s upside down – he owes more than the house is worth.
He has his insurance and taxes added to the mortgage. Both of those are going up, too.
A shower of little red flecks is hurtling toward his good shirt.
He turns on network news and is treated to a candidate pity party. I don’t like her. I don’t like him. I don’t like anybody.
What about Osama bin Laden and the two-front war?
We need to take a hard look at what we’re trying to accomplish there.
What about the oil companies and the price of gasoline
If elected president the first thing I will appoint a special committee.
Do you think credit card companies are in the business of gouging people?
If elected president I will meet with representatives of the banking community.
What about the drought?
Our studies indicate drought conditions are the result of not getting enough rain.
Yo. You have some spaghetti sauce on your shirt.
If elected your president I promise that will not happen.
That makes the guy from Culpeper feel oh-so-much better.
Sadly true, yet hilarious. Loved it!
Posted by B_Vineeta_Ribeiro
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